Reframing [Continued]

How did you get on?

Find it easy to see/ separate thoughts?

Could you see how a thought on something influenced how you felt and how you may have acted?

Ok let’s move on to step 2. Replacement thoughts.

So hopefully you have a list of a few things from this week. Now I want you to take one of those thoughts and write a replacement thought next to it.

Example:

‘I need a drink’ to ‘Im feeling like a drink but don’t need one. Instead I am going to go for a walk/run/ lift weights/ learn/ read/ listen to music/ a podcast’.

With the benefit of reflection we can come up with the right thing to do when the feeling is not high and in the moment. Then we can start to work on what we call reframing the thought and impacting the resulting feeling and behaviour.

One recent real example with a client was a highly successful Director managing over £100m revenue. But this client had self doubt when presenting information at board meetings/ conference calls.

Thoughts ‘I am going to fuck this up’ ‘I don’t belong on this call’ ‘ I am going to make a fool of myself’.

We worked on some replacement thoughts like

‘I am here on merit’ ‘I am an expert in my field and know the answers’ ‘I am prepared’.

Linked to some coaching around communication the results for this individual where huge. Several line managers emailing and calling to say how well the individual delivered, asking what changed noting the difference.

But this was still the same person, same departmental knowledge, nearly the same skills. They just reframed, thought differently, felt differently and delivered a more effective behaviour.

So to summarise – thoughts are not facts, we can control thoughts, feelings and behaviours.

Reframe thoughts for better outcomes!

Cheers,

Joe